It’s that time of the year again when everyone reflects on the year that has passed and sets goals for the new year.
We are all familiar with that feeling—excitedly setting new year’s resolutions in anticipation of a more productive and better year, then feeling increasingly defeated as we struggle to keep up with the goals we’ve set. At best, we give up on those goals and move ahead with more realistic ones. For some, however, the inability to keep up with goals has a large impact on personal competence levels, self-esteem, and, eventually, mental health.
Goal-setting often makes us feel hopeful about the year ahead. It also empowers us by giving us a clear direction towards the goals we want to achieve or the person we want to be.
We need to set realistic, achievable goals and update them regularly as the year progresses to make resolutions beneficial. In other words, while these goals challenge us, they are still within our reach to attain. Pushing ourselves and eventually achieving our goals increases the sense of control we feel over our life outcomes. This motivates us to achieve more, setting us on an upward spiral of emotional wellbeing.
We should also be open to tweaking our goals in light of unforeseen circumstances. In this COVID season, there could be unexpected turns of events that make our goals no longer relevant or achievable. This makes it important for us to be flexible and set new progress markers that continue to push us forward.
Ultimately, goals should work for us—we should not feel enslaved to the goals we’ve set at the start of the year. Should we find ourselves feeling discouraged and defeated, perhaps it is time to relook at our goals and set more achievable ones.
Dr John Lim, chief well-being officer at the Singapore Counselling Centre, said goal-setting itself is not a bad thing. But there is a need to focus on setting realistic, achievable goals and to update them regularly as the year goes along. “This enables us to adopt new year’s resolutions as a practice that increases our feelings of self-efficacy and well-being, rather than avoiding them for fear of missing our target,” he said. He warned that committing to unrealistic expectations can also result in disappointment and demotivation, which could have an impact on people’s self-esteem and affect their mental health.
“At the end of the day, goals should work for us.
We should not feel enslaved to the goals we’ve set at the start of the year. Should we find ourselves feeling discouraged and defeated, perhaps it is time to relook our goals and set ones that are achievable, “said Dr Lim.
We should not feel enslaved to the goals we set at the start of the year. Should we find ourselves feeling discouraged and defeated, perhaps it is time to relook at our goals and set ones that are achievable, “said Dr Lim.
Aventis Graduate School offers pro-bono counselling services by our master’s counselling students. We offer counselling services ranging from those experiencing personal to work-related difficulties. This free and confidential service is available to students and alumni of Aventis, as well as partner organizations. Our team of counsellors-in-training is ready to serve clients in person at the Aventis clinic or via an online video platform. They are currently completing the requirements for their Masters’s programme and are strictly overseen by their clinical supervisors, who have long-term experience in private practice and government settings.
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Check out our other article, 5 Ways To Stay Grounded In The Pandemic.
Sources:
https://www.todayonline.com/singapore/adulting-101-should-we-still-be-setting-new-years-resolutions-1781721